Rumor Mill - 001

Welcome to the Rumor Mill where I cover the rumors, conspiracies, and whispers of the UMBC. Let's get into it.

Hemlock Creed isn't actually piloting the Last Call! She died in the hospital! It's a Robot that was sent to kill Vice Howard!
~ Concerned 4 Vice

The fans and pros alike have been clamoring around the news that Hemlock Creed has come back to us. Considering her dramatic exit and the severity of her injuries, it's no surprise that nonsensical theories about her have popped up. No, I don't think there's any truth to this. Let's not forget the “No Robots” clause of the charter! She just has a prosthetic leg! As for a robotic assassin being sent to take out Vice, I think he’d appreciate the headlines posthumously.

I heard Billy Nobunaga has a signed headshot of Richardson Gold in his cockpit.    
~ Billy Fan 

This one has been popping off on the socials. There's even a picture! Unfortunately that picture is edited. I was able to track it down to a UMBC joke and memes thread on the SPP forums where it broke from containment. I wish it were true. It sounds like something Billy would do. Who knows, maybe Gold’s team will send him one now.

It's all fake! All the matches are predetermined and CGI! the Battlers are just actors that get high off fame! This organization is an abomination and is corrupting our young people to love glorified violence!
~ SolarParents4SolarChange

Yeah, sure, whatever.

Let's take a look at who submitted this since the claims themselves are not worth engaging with. SolarParents4SolarChange is a regressive group whose goal is to bring back the horrors of the “nuclear family” from before the Dark Ages. They’re straight up anti-children and view kids as property of parents. Real disgusting stuff. One of their founders, Herstwell Simpson, had a brother who was on the wrong side of the Gadsden Guild Conflict back in 002.98! These are not serious people and their ideology should be mocked and ridiculed.

I only included this submission to spread awareness of these grifting losers. If you're one of these weirdos, stop reading our magazine. You are not welcome. We will not tell you again.

That's it for the Rumor Mill this week. As always if you got a hot tip you can submit it here!

~ James "the Hitman" Yoon